This cruise used to go to Turkey for its first stop, but since having passengers shot or sold into ISIS slavery is frowned upon, we got to go to the amazing country of Albania.  What was amazing about it was that I didn’t go and punch the captain for taking us to such a dump.

Ok, ok…saying that it was a dump is harsh, forgive me.  Is dumpster fire better?  <slap my own hand>  I’m going to hell, I know.

After weeks of talking to Debbie about how great our cruise was going, I was disappointed that our first port wasn’t as glamorous as some of our previous stops.  It wasn’t terrible, I’m just being a prat, but I didn’t feel like we were really welcomed by Sarandë’s residents.  It seemed like this city had only recently become a cruise destination, and that the local people hadn’t yet come to terms with a bunch of entitled Americans invading their home.  I guess I can’t blame them.  We tried to be as respectful as possible and made the most of our visit.

That’s for sale?  You’re joking, right?

After walking around town for an hour or so, looking for the local market, the location of which had been described differently by every person we asked, we finally found it.  We entered a large tarp-covered area filled with vendors selling vegetables, fruit, and various mystery bottles filled with a plethora of interesting-looking contents.  Debbie and I wanted to try some local products, but after taking a look around, we decided that we didn’t want to test our GI system’s ability to avoid explosive diarrhea by consuming some E. coli-laden olives or something.

I know that my overly-sanitized American standard is rearing its ugly head, but let me describe a few things:

Actually, a picture says a thousand words. Look at the picture I’ve included with all of the random recycled soda bottles cram-packed with random liquids and chunks of vegetables and fruit (I think). All of this was for sale.  One woman grabbed a large Fanta bottle filled with red chunks of something suspended in an oily liquid with black little bits floating on top and said, “Try, try.”  No thanks, lady.

On the next table over stood jars and jars of honey. There was no color consistency of the honey between the different jars, which I found odd. Some jars were old baby food containers, some were jam or peanut butter jars, their lids identifying their previous contents.  All of the honey inside had sundry flotsam: a bit of an insect’s wing, specks that looked like dirt, and other unidentifiable bits and pieces. I’ve heard of unfiltered honey, but this is crazy.

Debbie and I looked at each other, cringed, and made our way to the exit, the need to try the local produce completely gone.

This gasoline is delicious!

Password for the video:  letmeseeit

Before even leaving the ship, we were told to try the local alcoholic beverage, Raki, which was described as a disgusting-tasting moonshine. Sounds delicious, we’ll look for some!

The four of us managed to find a very cute little bar on top of a building, overlooking the bay.  As we sat there, we talked about the potential Sarandë had as a cruise destination…actually, Kevin talked about it with his usual optimistic outlook on things, I just sat there and listened, rolling my eyes, ready for a stiff drink. Bring on the Raki!

With all the negative press Raki had received, I was expecting something absolutely revolting, but it turned out to be not so bad.  <Fake news!> I’ve imbedded a video of us trying it for your viewing pleasure. I’m hoping the link works; this is the first video I’ve tried to add to my posts.